god damn it!! i wrote this whole huge thing about how i'm feeling and it was all erased! 45 minutes of work for nothing. i was pissed off before, and now i feel even more shitty. here's the bottom line. my knee f'ing hurts, i was laughed at today, i felt embarrassed and lonely today (it wasn't too bad tho), i was yelled at in the morning and for being litteraly 2 minutes late because as my father said, "in the driveway is not in the house," and i feel like i'm not worth planning for. i would do anything to see my friends happy. am i worth that? well right now i feel quite doubtful that i'm ever worth calling or doing something special with. it's not even about that. i just feel like i make no impact on people's lives.

alright, alright, i'm sure all of this stuff is coming out of me because i'm in a really bad mood right now. i'm going to attempt to get some sleep. maybe i'll calm down in the morning. i would really appreciate something to look forward to tho. i have a feeling i'll still be pissy in the morning.

if anyone's actually reading this, please say something to make me feel better. i could really use it right now.

look what you've found, i've fallen down

sometimes, a person can only find comfort in crying. cry yourself to sleep, but don't drown in your tears.